The Two Of Us

36 years ago, on the 28th of January, Sheryl and I came together for the first time. I have been racking what's left of my brain for the past two weeks, trying to find the right words to commemorate our shared journey. I wanted to write something smart and loving, meaningful and moving, but I have nothing. When it comes to my dear friend and lover of 36 years, I am at a loss. You would think that, after all of these years, I would have something, ANYTHING, to say about our time together. However, when you get right down to it, the fact that we are still a loving couple after all of these years, and all of the pitfalls and travails that any couple goes through after so many years together, well, that is a statement in and of itself.
 We compliment each other, Sheryl and I. I can't think of myself in the singular after so many years together. Someone once said to me "I think of the two of you as one person: John and Sheryl, Sheryl and John.." and that's the way that I've come to think of us as well. We know what each other is thinking, most of the time. We exist on the same plane, seldom bumping into each other, even though our house is small.. Yin and Yang... Right and Left.. two inseparable parts of the same whole.
  It was not always this way. We came from different backgrounds... different religious upbringings, different ethnicities. I am 7 years older, and for the early part of our relationship, felt that I was too old for her. Now, at this juncture of our lives, the age difference seems so insignificant. The one thing that we have in common is that we both came from broken marriages. Not the fault of either one of us, but we suddenly found ourselves adrift and each with two children to raise.
 My love was always fond of saying that we had nothing in common. Well, we made our own common ground over the years, built on mutual respect and love for each other. We were warned that our differences would tear us apart. That religion and traditions would become points of contention, and ultimately tear us apart. They were wrong. Never in 36 years did we ever argue about religion. We were determined that this would never, ever, cause us problems.
 I will not tell you that we did not have our problems. That would be a lie. Every couple goes through their trials and rough spots. We had them, and they were not easy to overcome, but each time that it looked like we were on the rocks, we managed to right ourselves and pull together for our love.
 So, here we are, 36 years after our first time together, and still together. We are better friends than we ever were before. We are a stronger couple than we ever were. We have sailed the sea of life together for 36 years, and we are better for being together through it all, the good and the bad. Love to you, Shesh... I always thought that we could do it, if we were just given the chance.
John Zaffino, Kent New York, January 27, 2014


  1. Isn't in nice to have that proverbial "last laugh"?

    That collective bunch of naysayers, critics, voices of doom, always standing on some sideline rendering predictions based on what...their own perfect lives?

    You both didn't need to be given a chance as far as I'm concerned, knowing you these past months. Seems to me that you and Sheryl fell into this love with more commitment to each other than many couples will ever experience, ups and downs aside. Love becomes stale, all too easily, because people take that blessing of togetherness for granted.

    36 years? Look and Sheryl are still honeymooners!


    1. Thank you, Patty. You are a great lady that has had your share of heartache, but you are on the same journey as we. It's nice to have someone as nice as you and your husband on the journey alongside us.


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